“The ‘bullet train’ stopped being an actual bullet train when we realized we’d have to share low-speed track with local commuter and freight services,” said a worker in Fresno who asked to remain anonymous. “That was in 2012.”
Saint Colin prays with Occupy and firebombs a series of naval bases before being ensconced in a palatial home and preparing himself with spiritual rigor for his pitch to the Goddess Nike.
Developing – A Hooters Air flight from Twig, Minnesota, to Intercourse, Pennsylvania, was forced to make an emergency landing in Spread Eagle, Wisconsin, by a woman claiming to have an “emotional support penis.”
CHP posted a humorous comment on Facebook. The Agricultural Labor Relations Board threatened to report it to the Department of Human Resources.
The new complex is near a planned San Joaquin passenger rail system station where heroin addicts will greet commuters with the thousand-yard stare so familiar in San Francisco.
“They throw them everywhere: in the ocean, in the sand, in the trash can,” said Charles Bukowski, a Venice Beach maintenance worker who regularly finds dismembered scooters on the boardwalk.
“California will protect our humble public servants from radical authoritarians who forcibly suppress their opposition by controlling industry, commerce, and transportation,” said our virtuous Attorney General.