Rational activists who glue themselves to airplanes or routinely lay down on busy freeways have simply had enough of the people who just want to get to work every day and pay their taxes.
“We can’t beat open heart surgery for sheer drama,” said campaign manager and fellow Irishman Jen O’Malley Dillon. “But we can let people know that Beto is just like them only better.”
Mexico’s healthcare system is helping international migrants achieve their American Dream by aborting their children before they cross the border.
“This campaign isn’t a democracy,” said Sanders’ CFO Yuri Larin. “It’s impossible to finish off capitalism without having finished off social democracy in the working-class movement.”
Buttigieg has cancelled his appearances in all 50 states, Canada, and Mexico. A spokesman did not say when the Democratic presidential candidate would cancel the remainder of his world tour.
“Jerry, take drink, you look little dehydrated, comrade,” said De Blasio after announcing enhanced surveillance of PS 149. “You seem little dehydrated, da? You are OK? Jerry?”
Sacramento Mayor Darrell Steinberg said “keeping police out of black communities where they don’t belong would go a long way toward ending white privilege.”