“I can’t quite believe it yet, but Mr. Hogg convinced a ragtag group of farmers that weapons of war like the AK-47 should not be in the hands of civilians,” said US special envoy Zalmay Khalilzad.
Buttigieg has cancelled his appearances in all 50 states, Canada, and Mexico. A spokesman did not say when the Democratic presidential candidate would cancel the remainder of his world tour.
Bernie agrees with Venezuelan treasury chief Salazar, who says his country can still be saved by ruthless economic control of bullet ownership.
“If the Eagle at the top of the Tree of the Great Peace sees in the distance any danger threatening these principles, he will at once warn the people of the Nation,” said Warren.
“If they go low, we kick them, threaten to bomb the White House, and publish presidential assassination porn in the New York Times,” said Eric Holder. “Civility can wait until after The Purge.”
“All I do is think of Donald Trump, Uber, guns, and the NRA, and all I want to do is punch them all in the face,” he said. “You got a problem with that?”
Bernie Sanders will not have armed security. Instead, he will be surrounded by up to 10,000 unarmed Great Patriots from nudist communes and college campuses nationwide.