Gavin Newsom to deliver pallets of remittances to El Salvador

“I’m the government, and I’m here to help our 680,000 El Salvadoran immigrants who export up to $500 million a month to their home country,” Newsom said as pallets of cash were loaded into a Cal Guard C-130 at Travis Air Force Base.

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State government adds ‘RIOT’ and ‘RESIST’ buttons to elevators

“The state’s emergency plan requires employees to resist fascism,” said spokesman Hassan Chop. “The ‘RIOT’ button takes loyal employees to the garage level where we store signs, masks, and other materials useful for rooting out fascists.”