The Duchess of Mouseton has renounced the royal household and moved in with Canadian billionaire Sylvester Shyster, the evil uranium mining mastermind who has promised Minnie her own TV show.
“The project was delayed when market research showed most parents believe Hillary left Americans to die in Benghazi,” said Hasbro spokeswoman Prica Giocattolo. “And then Trump actually did save the embassy in Baghdad.”
“If just one dad at their most vulnerable can take that last piece of clothing off without shaming their neighbor’s kids, then that serves our purpose,” said Sesame Workshop.
The procedure was carried out quickly by Jeong herself with a pair of high-quality castration pliers under the supervision of her colleagues on the Editorial Board.
“Ms. Almánzar, previously arrested for assault and reckless endangerment, told an infirm senior citizen that she was filming a political campaign video,” the U.S. Attorney allegedly said.
By the year 2030, many video deepfakes will demand anti-human policies so absurd that everyone will believe the fakes are real Hollywood actors.
Transgodzilla’s signature weapon will no longer be the unstoppable force of atomic breath, but the immovable object known as “resting bitch face” that will defeat the male gaze once and for all.