“I’ve learned that correct change cannot be known objectively,” said one customer. “Next time I buy a $3 coffee with a $20 bill and only get $1 back, I’ll be eliminating a little bit of racism from the world.”
“Frankly, it’s just easier this way,” Joe Biden said after news broke that Hunter was paid to serve on the Amtrak Board of Directors because he spent a lot of time on trains.
CalPERS officially aligns itself with U.S. policy, but draws a bright red trail of dollars to Chinese intercontinental ballistic missiles, Muslim concentration camps, the NBA, and Hunter Biden.
“Science be damned. If you want the masses to care about climate change, you need people like me to get arrested at least once a week,” said Fonda.
“When evil Christian restaurant owners force their workers to serve healthy food and be nice to people, we have to act,” said third-wave feminist Lovechild Vaginica.
Educational conditions under Common Core do not allow the plant to continue, but IKEA will do everything it can to help workers find less logical work.
“I wanted to show my support by letting Democrats buy the zero-cent penny so we can take their money and give it to people who have no money to spend,” said Alabama Gov. Kay Ivey.