Mayor and news columnist meet in thought bubble, decide Jesus Christ was right: “The homeless will always be with us.”
“I wish we’d thought of enlisting a fascist dictator,” said one Guerrilla Girl. “It’s like our 35-year effort has been for nothing.”
A source high on the Steinberg administration said the cartel leader was in Sacramento to provide intelligence about migrant border-crossing tactics in the El Centro and San Diego sectors.
California Gov. Gavin Newsom ordered the Skull & Crossbones to be flown on Monday morning, signaling his official intent to rape, loot, and pillage the United States of America at his earliest opportunity.
“We’re just cutting to the chase,” said Mayor Steinberg. “Rather than waiting for full socialism to come to us, we’re going full socialist while we can still control the outcome.”
“We held our colleague to high professional standards and we believe she has appropriately fled the country,” said the school principal.
Just days after reports that homeless residents are digging multi-story homes in flood control levees, a city task force has acted swiftly to shore up those vital affordable housing projects.