San Francisco pride: Unemployment down after surge of homeless drug addicts
“Just imagine how many jobs we can create when homeless addicts from other states hear about our free housing offer,” said Mayor Mark Farrell.
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‘Resistance Air’ pilots land on wrong runways to protest Trump immigration policies
Air Traffic Controllers heard sounds of a struggle and expletives in Esperanto from the cockpit before the plane landed on the empty runway.
San Francisco SPCA ordered to stop using Daleks to vaporize homeless people
The homeless eradication campaign could raise more questions about the role of robots in society, especially if they continue to vaporize people in the public right-of-way.
Colin Kaepernick shipwrecked on Alcatraz, bitten by viper, survives
The ship was caught in hurricane force winds with the racist name of “El Niño” so we began to throw NFL players overboard.
Cops: Illegal immigrant who shot legal aid volunteer will get aid from immigrant aid center
The circumstances of the case are worthy of American’s finest news source, The Onion, but The Brie has the scoop.
Scientist discovers ‘peak diversity’ in remote island archipelago
It was totally unexpected, but this scientist found an ecosystem which has achieved complete and total diversity.
Top 4 reasons to vote for Gavin Newsom
“We have garbage police at every street fair to make sure the addicted homeless gay illegal fetish queens are properly recycling their waste,” Newsom said. “Part of my plan to save the planet is to bring that culture to the State Capitol.”
