The Duchess of Mouseton has renounced the royal household and moved in with Canadian billionaire Sylvester Shyster, the evil uranium mining mastermind who has promised Minnie her own TV show.
Hundreds of the most enlightened progressive voices in California denied that they had ever hosted or attended fundraisers in a “subterranean ambrosia grotto.”
“Science be damned. If you want the masses to care about climate change, you need people like me to get arrested at least once a week,” said Fonda.
By the year 2030, many video deepfakes will demand anti-human policies so absurd that everyone will believe the fakes are real Hollywood actors.
The hard work of ending toxic masculinity may never be done, but HBO is having a go with a new explicit TV series featuring up to 60 erect male human penises per episode.
Transgodzilla’s signature weapon will no longer be the unstoppable force of atomic breath, but the immovable object known as “resting bitch face” that will defeat the male gaze once and for all.
Researchers responsible for the robot driving systems have hired lawyers and crisis-management consultants in anticipation of social justice protests.
