Good news: Griffin might die soon. Bad news: She’s only 59, and could subject us to 16 more years of her unbearable personality before offing herself so no one remembers her as feeble, ineffectual, and pathetic, instead of gross, hateful, and pathetic.
“We also want you to know that last week we said guns were evil, but today we’ve declared that guns are essential until we decide that guns are evil again, which should happen after we get back to ignoring typhus,” Garcetti said.
A peer-reviewed study conducted by Vanna White has found that Democrat presidential candidate Joe Biden didn’t know anything, and doesn’t know when he didn’t know it.
Experts say the number of powerful vaginas available worldwide is never more than a few hundred, and the new spike in demand has already caused a shortage.
Hi, I’m Gavin Newsom, and I’d like to give you some tips on wiping your ass because a significant percentage of California residents weren’t taught this skill as children. For that, I blame all of us. We can do better.
“We’ll buy the Bee for a dollar if my uncle doesn’t sabotage the deal,” said Newsom. “But Steinberg will have to keep the debt because that’s all government is good at anyway.”
“Gender is a social construct, but you’re trapped in the wrong gender,” said the nurse. I felt her empathy from behind three inches of polycarbonate. “And you requested a penis but all we have in stock are vaginas.”