Biden Infrastructure Plan Hires Immigrants to Cut Roads in Half

“Sometimes roads need to go on a diet,” Transportation Secretary Pete Buttigieg said Thursday about President Joe Biden’s new infrastructure plan.

“We have a once in a century opportunity to remake transportation in the United States, and we also inherited a border crisis,” said Buttigieg, the former mayor of South Bend, Indiana. “So our infrastructure plan is to pay illegal immigrants to literally cut American roads in half.”

“Yes, the plan is unglamorous,” Buttigieg added, “but we already have a trillion dollar backlog of roads and bridges that our previous trillion dollar infrastructure bills didn’t fix. Our new trillion dollar infrastructure bill will tax the rich to get rid of roads they don’t use anyway.”

“The American people know we really don’t need all that broken-down infrastructure, but there are some jobs they’re just too fat and lazy to do,” Buttigieg said. “Our neighbors to the south know that sometimes roads need to go on a diet.”

Author: Huey P. Newsom

Huey P. "Navin" Newsom was born a poor black child who reported illegal immigrants to ICE before he wised up and invented the Sanctuary City. Today, Navin is the governor-in-waiting of California. As the leader of the Democratic Socialists for Self Defense, he plans to wall off the city of Oakland to protect undocumented immigrants from Darrell Steinberg's secret Nazi police force.

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