Rural voters fed up with city folk are bringing poisonous snakes to Denver

Denver, Colo. (AP) — “Big city liberals love to tell other people how to live,” said the masked man who declined to give his name as he dumped another box of rattlesnakes into the vacant lot at 1612 N Harrison Street. “We call ourselves the Rocky Mountain Snake Action Fund, and so far we’ve dropped off 987 snakes inside the Denver city limits.”

The shadowy group appears to have no Internet presence, but members say they are retaliating for the recent Colorado ballot measure that reintroduces wolves into the state’s western mountains.

Urban voters unaffected by wolves “are believed to largely support wolf reintroduction” according to a report by National Public Radio, while ranchers and hunters who live in the gray wolf’s native range opposed the measure.

“Colorado will become the first state where voters direct the reintroduction of gray wolves rather than the federal government,” said the report.

Rob Edward, who led the ballot campaign for the Rocky Mountain Wolf Action Fund, said, “If the people of Colorado say we want wolves, the next step is to lean into that reality.”

The masked man climbed back into his well-used Ford F150.

“Tell your readers we’ve got thousands more snakes where those came from,” he said. “Lean into that reality.”

Author: Huey P. Newsom

Huey P. "Navin" Newsom was born a poor black child who reported illegal immigrants to ICE before he wised up and invented the Sanctuary City. Today, Navin is the governor-in-waiting of California. As the leader of the Democratic Socialists for Self Defense, he plans to wall off the city of Oakland to protect undocumented immigrants from Darrell Steinberg's secret Nazi police force.

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