
Book publisher Random Penguin House is up to its mandible in print scheduling and budget planning.
“We paid $65 million for a book due two years ago,” said a source close to RPH. “Literary exploration with Barack is as bad as you imagine, but no words can express our horror. We’re calling the book The Worst Journey in the World, and it could become a classic if he would just write the damn thing.”
“That’s not who we are,” said Barack, known for a streamlined style that minimizes drag and a tongue equipped with rear-facing barbs.