Trigger Warning: Not Satire.
“This shit won’t ever stop unless we fucking take it all down,” said Ms. Rahman, the public interest attorney caught on video allegedly participating in a conspiracy to commit arson with explosives during a crime of violence.
Unfortunately, because this is 2020 and destroying the foundations of America is all the rage, rational people must conclude that “take it all down” is inclusive of all those rights Ms. Rahman will enjoy in court as a defendant: due process, innocent until proven guilty, the right to bail, to confront your accusers, to have counsel, a trial by a jury of your peers, to appeal, etc.
Fortunately for Ms. Rahman – who is “not a radical” and “not an anarchist” but “quite the opposite” – she’s not being charged with arson in Pakistan, the country from which her family emigrated.
Let’s be real. If regular Americans are “trying to change the world” do we brew up homemade explosives and throw Molotov cocktails into vandalized police cars? No. We go to the City Council or School Board meeting, write letters to our elected officials, volunteer at the homeless shelter, join a prayer group. All some of us ever do is hold down a job or two, provide for our families, raise our children, and hope they change the world.
But wait. Maybe the lesson the establishment wants us to learn is that these lawyers — and thousands, perhaps millions, of people like them — are just regular Americans, not “anarchists” on “the fringe” who are “disconnected.”
Maybe regular Americans really are the kind of people who stock up on empty beer bottles, gasoline, and toilet paper and scream “fucking take it all down” before torching a cop car in someone else’s neighborhood.
I mean, we all have our own ideas of just how bad our system sucks, right? I know I do.
Maybe that’s who I am. Maybe that’s who you are.
But since no one wants to torch their own home, let’s all take the Antifa NIMBY Pledge: You set fire to my neighborhood, I’ll break all the windows in yours.
Nah. We’re Not Domestic Terrorists. That’s Not Who We Are ™.
$10 says these
domestic terrorists progressive lawyers will also enjoy that other ubiquitous American right — the right to cop a plea bargain.