Former Vice President Joe Biden is re-instituting the 2012 “Truth Team” to help his presidential campaign bring back the Age of Political Integrity and Civility by determining which class enemies are demented authoritarian white-supremacist Republican Nazis who cheat on their taxes, murder women, want children and seniors to starve, abuse their pets, poison the environment, hate science, and want to put black people back in chains, among other less tasteful things.
“We want to go back to the future when it was legal to tell jokes about black people and still get elected, and Republican presidents were just old, senile, sentimental, hypocrites like Ronald Reagan who should have been assassinated before he could tear up the Constitution and declare himself king,” Biden said in a manner that in no way could be understood as anything but a joke.
The Biden administration, Biden said, will stand as a symbol, a shining light on a hill, of America’s best traditions of punishing racist white enemies like Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas and any other person who pretends to be black but is really just a Republican.
“But that’s not all we’re doing,” Biden said. “We’re also encouraging scientists to hate Republicans because Democrats have always been high when they go low.”
“They need to be stopped before they destroy the rule of law,” Biden said, adding that he was “absolutely certain that generations from now” 2020 will be seen as the moment when “we came together to remake this great nation so that it would always reflect our very best selves and our highest ideals. That’s what the Truth Team has always been about.”
Biden Photo: Suchat Pederson/The News Journal