Gotham turns on Bat Signal, finds out Mayor de Blasio is working for Sauron the Necromancer

Gotham turned on the Bat Signal for the first time since Bill de Blasio was elected mayor, intending to honor medical workers who are heroically trying to save the city from a deadly plague that is killing thousands of innocent people around the world.

That’s when they discovered the specially modified searchlight that’s supposed to summon help and strike fear into the hearts of Gotham’s criminals has been replaced by the Great Lidless Eye of Sauron.

“I tried to turn the damn thing off, but was suddenly filled with the choking fear that a gang of released prisoners was headed for my house,” said the city worker who unknowingly turned on the Great Eye. “Until now, I thought the Dark Lord was just a cool fantasy character from a movie.”

The mayor’s office released a statement about the flame atop the 86-story skyscraper that has been blazing since Monday night.

“It would be wise for us all to join with him, for only as a mighty army that is stronger together can we defeat this great evil,” the statement said. “I will give you the chance to aid me willingly, but you can still elect the way of pain.”

Critics say the Giant Eye is filling the wrong people with fear, and that we should all ignore the media trolls calling for the nationalization of entire industries and corrupting our hearts with delusions of socialist power and redistributed wealth.

Author: Huey P. Newsom

Huey P. "Navin" Newsom was born a poor black child who reported illegal immigrants to ICE before he wised up and invented the Sanctuary City. Today, Navin is the governor-in-waiting of California. As the leader of the Democratic Socialists for Self Defense, he plans to wall off the city of Oakland to protect undocumented immigrants from Darrell Steinberg's secret Nazi police force.

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