Muslim feminists ‘take back the thoughts of boys’ in next-level Islam PR campaign

In a new public relations campaign spreading through majority-Muslim neighborhoods, Islamic feminists plan to “take back the thoughts of boys” in their cities.

In Detroit and other cities around the country, hundreds of feminists in floor-length burkas — who are sick and tired of boys ogling them and won’t take it anymore — are marching back and forth in front of giant billboards that state “Girls’ Bodies Aren’t Responsible For Boys’ Thoughts.”

“It’s not the dress, not the skirt, not the yoga pants, and not the sports bra I’m wearing under this burka,” said a Detroit woman who identified herself as Lallab. “It’s you! Exercise some self control!”

Another woman at the rally shouted “My body, Allah’s choice!”

Rep. Rashida Tlaib (D-Mich.), a Muslim woman of color who represents Michigan’s 13th congressional district, told the crowd that “boys are obsessed with our bodies, how we talk, how we look, and even how we just stand there.”

“The policing of our bodies is interconnected to all the social justice movements all around the country,” Tlaib said. “As proud Muslim burka-wearing feminists, we must take back the thoughts of boys until we end the male gaze once and for all!”

“And let me tell you,” Tlaib continued. “This obsession with our bodies. You know, in the Michigan legislature for six years, I used to tell boys, ‘Yo, yo, you know what, you’re so freakin’ obsessed with what I decide to do with my body, maybe you shouldn’t even want to have sex with me!'”

The Sacramento Brie reached out to several hundred male Islamic Imams for comment, but received no replies by press time.

Author: Huey P. Newsom

Huey P. "Navin" Newsom was born a poor black child who reported illegal immigrants to ICE before he wised up and invented the Sanctuary City. Today, Navin is the governor-in-waiting of California. As the leader of the Democratic Socialists for Self Defense, he plans to wall off the city of Oakland to protect undocumented immigrants from Darrell Steinberg's secret Nazi police force.

One thought

  1. Yeah, well if they’d quit wearing those suggestive, seductive burkas maybe we could avert our gaze. We men are the real victims here. Quit blaming the victim, Rashida!


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