Sanders picks Crimson Dynamo as VP, vows to ‘bury Joe Biden’

After Joe Biden shocked the political world by choosing a Jewish American superhero as his vice president, arch rival Bernie Sanders named Crimson Dynamo — a powerful, diabolical, and egotistical Socialist super scientist — as his running mate.

“I shall bury Joe Biden and The Thing!” Sanders promised at a campaign rally in Houston, unveiling one of the world’s greatest experts on electricity as his campaign partner.

Created in 1963 by scientist Anton Vanko at the insistence of Soviet Premier Nikita Khrushchev, the Crimson Dynamo is an advanced suit of armor that generates and controls electricity in all its forms, such as devastating bolts of electromagnetic energy that can vaporize American voting machines.

“As you all know, the establishment in this country is very nervous,” Sanders told the crowd. “The economic establishment and the political establishment sabotaged our revolution in 2016, and they are trying to do it again in 2020. But now, with Crimson Dynamo at my side, we will show America the true power of Socialist technology!”

Author: Huey P. Newsom

Huey P. "Navin" Newsom was born a poor black child who reported illegal immigrants to ICE before he wised up and invented the Sanctuary City. Today, Navin is the governor-in-waiting of California. As the leader of the Democratic Socialists for Self Defense, he plans to wall off the city of Oakland to protect undocumented immigrants from Darrell Steinberg's secret Nazi police force.

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