Glimpsing Apocalypse, Barack Obama begins campaign for First Horseman

Former president Barack Obama has glimpsed the Apocalypse threatened by “cancel culture” — social media mobs demanding that people be fired for their sins — and is setting up a campaign to run for Office of First Horseman (OFH).

“Publicly shaming people is not activism. That’s not bringing about change. If all you’re doing is casting stones, you’re probably not going to get that far,” the supernaturally cool, charismatic, Mr. Obama said at the Obama Foundation Summit in Chicago.

Mr. Obama’s comments sparked a wave of adulation from both the left and right reminiscent of his Lightworker days, and by early Thursday had been viewed millions of times as many stressed that the entire world needed to hear his message.

The new OFH campaign will share the logo and infrastructure of Mr. Obama’s previous organizations — Organizing for America, Obama for America, and Organizing for Action — and seek to unite the nations, bring peace to Israel and the Middle East, and earn the crown of conqueror.

“Unlike his presidency, the First Horseman won’t encounter the entrenched Republican opposition that allowed the Apocalypse to occur,” said Washington Post columnist Max Boot. “This time he’ll be ready to save the world.”

OFH campaign manager Mitch Stewart said Obama won’t actually ride a white horse, but he will keep all his promises from the first half of the Tribulation.

“If you like your peaceful Middle East, Mr. Obama promises you’ll be able to keep your peaceful Middle East,” Stewart said.

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