The only progressive show on TV featuring muppets has broken new ground with an involuntarily celibate pre-teen male character named Kale, whose father enabled a fascist coup d’etat in two different centuries and repented by becoming a drag queen stripper at the local public library.
According to the Harvard Law Review, Sesame Street decided to add Kale’s character because 63 million children under the age of 11 live in a home with a parent who is so distraught about their White Supremacist past that they’ve had a complete psychotic break and decided to vote for Beto O’Rourke the next time or go to prison for exposing themselves in public.
“There’s nothing else out there that addresses young, young kids who are involuntarily celibate because their fathers voted for Trump and Hitler,” said Kamala Singlehorn, a senior content manager with Sesame Workshop.
“We hope Kale can help these impressionable children find their sexual identity before they reach puberty,” Singlehorn said.
The program also aims to help drag queen dads to exploit, uh, explain to their pre-teen kids just how evil it is not to enjoy watching fully adult men get their jollies in front of pre-pubescent elementary students at the public library.
“If just one dad at their most vulnerable can take that last piece of clothing off without shaming their neighbor’s kids, then that serves our purpose,” Singlehorn said.