Euphoria: HBO will end toxic masculinity with up to 60 erect penises per episode

The hard work of ending toxic masculinity may never be done, but Home Box Office is having a go with a new explicit TV series that could feature up to 60 erect male human penises per episode.

Warner Bros., the company that owns HBO and once brought you Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck, says it gave the Euphoria team complete autonomy to decide exactly how many male sex organs per hour would do the most damage to the toxic male self-image held by many teenage boys.

“We had, like, 80 penises in one episode,” said Euphoria creator Sam Levinson, age 34, who wrote the entire first season based on his own experiences. “But that was too many for the rape scene with a 17-year-old trans girl, so we cut back to 30.”

Zendaya, who plays the role of teenager Rue Bennett, says the part completes her transition from Disney Channel to adult actress.

“I used to play Rocky Blue, a book-smart vegan girl who loved dancing and animal rights,” said Zendaya of her role on Disney’s Shake It Up. “That really prepared me to become a teenager with a severe drug addiction who hangs out with friends who choke each other during sex.”

“We can get away with a lot of shit with comedy,” Zendaya said.

Aside from establishing new teen sex norms, the HBO show employed an “intimacy coordinator” to ensure the well-being of actors who participate in sex scenes or other intimate scenes.

Among other things, the coordinator helped actress Barbie Ferreira, 22, get comfortable filming a scene in which an obese man on a webcam pulls out his micro penis and masturbates to her.

“Liberals used to tell young people ‘never trust anyone over 30’,” Levinson said. “Beginning now, we’re telling them never trust anyone who won’t show you a male sex organ at least 30 times an hour.”

Author: Huey P. Newsom

Huey P. "Navin" Newsom was born a poor black child who reported illegal immigrants to ICE before he wised up and invented the Sanctuary City. Today, Navin is the governor-in-waiting of California. As the leader of the Democratic Socialists for Self Defense, he plans to wall off the city of Oakland to protect undocumented immigrants from Darrell Steinberg's secret Nazi police force.

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