The country with the worst poverty rate in North America has announced it will pay women from other countries to become “abortion tourists.”

“Our country is on the front lines of the escalating attack on the rights of women,” said the benevolent dictator of the country formerly known as California. “If the People’s Republic of Aztlan doesn’t protect the traditional value of human sacrifice, who will?”

Under a new executive proclamation, Aztlan will send taxpayer dollars across international borders so foreign women can afford to come here and sacrifice their children to the gods.

“Aztlan will continue to honor the old gods and the new by protecting a woman’s right to abortion even if she has no uterus,” says the proclamation, which also funnels taxpayer funds to film companies that protect traditional values.

The word “Aztlan” is from the Aztec language of Nahuatl, which combines “aztatl” meaning “heroin” and “tlan” meaning “place of.”