Instead of taking a short flight to Vietnam’s capital, North Korean leader Kim Jong-Un rode his armored train for 60 hours over 2,000 miles to meet President Donald Trump for their second nuclear summit.
“AOC supports my socialism, and I support her Green New Deal,” President Jong-Un said through a translator, using the preferred term of endearment for Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (D-NY). “In the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea we are very concerned about climate change.”
Ocasio-Cortez praised President Jong-Un’s choice of transportation. “The great leader’s train only manages 33 miles per hour,” she said, using President Jong-Un’s preferred term of endearment, “but we have to start somewhere if the entire world is going to make air travel unnecessary.”
Jong-Un and Ocasio-Cortez also share other endearing qualities besides their hyphenated last names and a love for massive social transformation.
According to Ocasio-Cortez, the Green New Deal is “a 10-year plan to mobilize every aspect of American society at a scale not seen since World War 2 to achieve net-zero greenhouse gas emissions.” Estimated to cost up to $9 trillion a year, the plan calls for upgrading or replacing “every building in the U.S. for state-of-the-art energy efficiency.”
Jong-Un said he was “jealous of AOC” because North Korea can still only afford 5-year plans.
When asked how North Korea would feed its people and pay for a massive infrastructure overhaul, Jong-Un quoted Ocasio-Cortez. “The question isn’t how will we pay for it, but what will we do with our new shared prosperity,” said the Sun of the Socialist Future.
Editor’s Note: We reached out to AOC’s staff, who said they share hyphenated last names. Jong-Un is actually Baby Kim’s first name. We apologize for the error.