San Francisco pride: Unemployment down after surge of homeless drug addicts

10182012- Business and Engineering Career Fair at Seattle University

Homeless drug addicts are littering San Francisco with so many used needles that the city is hiring full time workers just to clean up the hazardous waste. The new First Needle Responders will answer resident complaints and remove needles and syringes from “hot spots” every day of the week.

“We had a job fair just for needle responders and demand was so high we had to turn most applicants away,” said Mayor Mark Farrell. “Just imagine how many jobs we can create when homeless addicts from other states hear about our free housing offer.”

Farrell was referring to a $2 billion ballot measure proposed by Sen. Kevin de Leon (D-Los Angeles) that will provide free housing to the state’s unprecedented number of homeless people.

“We have a burgeoning humanitarian crisis whose epicenter is here in California,” de Leon said. “Senate Bill 1206 is our plan. Free housing is an American value just like apple pie and baseball and puppies. If we build, they will come.”

Farrell told the media that discarded syringes on the streets are among the top litter complaints in the city.

“We used to pay nothing to collect 275,000 syringes every month,” he said. “Now we have a workforce we can pay to do that. It’s a win-win.”

Public Health Director Barbara Garcia said the city’s growing problem with human waste could reduce unemployment even further.

“The real issue is that the more people we can get living on the street, using needles, defecating and urinating everywhere, the more people we can hire to clean it up,” said Garcia. “De Leon’s ballot measure will help us do that.”

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