One day after Nazis at the Federal Communications Commission repealed Barack Obama’s “Net Neutrality” rules, the Internet was rocked by the execution of AOL’s Instant Messenger service.
“First they came for AOL,” said Al Gore, inventor of the Internet. “Who’s next if I say nothing because I didn’t have Instant Messenger?”
Users who visit AIM.com are redirected to a support article with details on the brutal execution.
“We resisted, but the long knives murdered Instant Messenger on Dec. 15, 2017,” says the article, which also provides an FAQ which describes the depravity which awaits us all under the boot of Donald Trump’s political soldiers.
Q. Will there be a replacement product for AIM?
A. No, and next they’re coming for SnapChat.
Q. What features are impacted?
A. All features are impacted by the untimely and brutal murder. Resist now or else.
Q. Where can I go to join the Resistance?
A. The Resistance is being organized from a war room in the old Kansas City railyards. See myspace.com.
Q. What happens to my data?
A. All your data has been transferred to the National Socialist Agency (NSA) for review by the Waffle Schnitzelstaffen (SS).
Q. Can I view and save my chat history?
A. Yes. The SS will contact you. Look for a pop-up message on your screen and click the OK button to accept the file transfer.
