Democrats rebrand party with new populist slogan: ‘Don’t Be Rich’

Democrats met in Fresno, CA, for a Bullet Train photo opportunity, and to unveil their latest campaign slogan: “Don’t Be Rich.”

Democratic leaders believe they lost to President Donald Trump partly because voters don’t know what the party stands for. So they’re trying to rebrand themselves with a new slogan and a populist new agenda before the 2018 midterms.

The slogan is “Don’t Be Rich” and Democrats rolled it out Monday afternoon in Fresno, California, during the photo-op for High Speed Rail.

“We’re in Fresno because the 220-mph Silicon Valley Express will move thousands of workers who can barely afford to rent, let alone buy, a Bay Area home,” said Nancy Pelosi (D-San Francisco), referring to the yet-unfinished bullet train.

“And ‘Don’t Be Rich’ is our new slogan because that’s the best way to reduce your personal carbon emissions,” she said. “It’s a perfect match for Fresno and the New California Dream: Fly less, drive less, eat less meat, and don’t have kids.”

The party’s new direction also jives with the Democrat Party’s push for affordable housing.

“Let’s just admit it,” said Gov. Brown. “When workers in Mountain View are living in travel trailers on the side of the road, the idea of affordable housing in the Bay Area is dead. Places like Fresno could be perfect, but only if the bullet train becomes a reality.”

“We are the party of the working people,” said Lt. Gov. Gavin Newsom. “When Trump stole working-class voters from us, we knew we had to respond.”

“So that’s why we’re here in Fresno, where per capita income is less than $20,000 and homes are still available for less than $200,000,” said Newsom, who lives in San Francisco, owns a winery in Sonoma County, drives a Tesla, and hopes to become the next Governor. “It’s the perfect place to find people who can’t afford to buy a $100,000 Tesla even after $35,000 in tax and government rebate benefits.”

Recent market research indicates that Newsom is right. Tesla sells its cars to a much higher percentage of men who are also, on average, younger and wealthier than those purchasing other cars.

Democrats say rich people are worse than anyone for the climate, so you need to start taking “high-impact” actions like driving less, flying less, becoming a vegan, and going childless.

Chuck Schumer (D-New York) flew to Fresno for the 10-minute ceremony to acknowledge that he was partially to blame for the American people not knowing what Democrats stands for.

“We stand for people who worry that climate change is destroying their way of life,” he said. “And we have three messages for the people of Fresno. Democrats will raise your wages, lower the cost of your families, and give you better skills.”

Schumer wasn’t clear how the bullet train would lower costs for family-oriented commuters who shouldn’t even have children, because the train may not ever reach San Jose and one-way fares between Fresno and San Jose could cost up to $63.

But Schumer did say that the Bay Area has “the greatest concentration of economic wealth of any place in the country” and that “getting low-wage workers from here to there is one of our highest priorities.”

Author: Huey P. Newsom

Huey P. "Navin" Newsom was born a poor black child who reported illegal immigrants to ICE before he wised up and invented the Sanctuary City. Today, Navin is the governor-in-waiting of California. As the leader of the Democratic Socialists for Self Defense, he plans to wall off the city of Oakland to protect undocumented immigrants from Darrell Steinberg's secret Nazi police force.

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