Bengals ink NFL brothel deal with Browns

As news of the Pirate’s Booty Sports Brothel in Las Vegas spread across the NFL, the Cincinnati Bengals (6-9-1) and Cleveland Browns (1-15) announced that they will each use the other club’s locker room in a reciprocal prostitution deal.

“We don’t have the resources to go outside the NFL for something like this,” said a front-office staffer for the Browns who refused to be identified. “But we think of this as a public service that will really benefit the players. Maybe we’ll have more wins next season because of it.”

Other pro sports leagues are also taking notice. In the NBA, the Sacramento Kings are the first franchise to publicly explore the financial possibilities of prostitution.

“We just opened a brand new stadium in downtown Sacramento,” said a representative for city mayor Darrell Steinberg. “There are plenty of cheap hotels nearby where a business like this could really do well.”

The Hotel Marshall in downtown Sacramento

Author: Huey P. Newsom

Huey P. "Navin" Newsom was born a poor black child who reported illegal immigrants to ICE before he wised up and invented the Sanctuary City. Today, Navin is the governor-in-waiting of California. As the leader of the Democratic Socialists for Self Defense, he plans to wall off the city of Oakland to protect undocumented immigrants from Darrell Steinberg's secret Nazi police force.

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